After Ervin, I never think of loving again.. But in case someone is designed to come into my life, I am willing to open my heart the moment he knocks..
I’d been reckless in my choices with my past relationships.. There were bad signs that I overlooked.. At the end of all my foolish moves, I was always the one left behind with a broken heart and broken dreams.. And the hardest part each time, it required me a lot of courage before I was able to get through..
One of the consolations today, I can always look back in the past and think that whatever experience I had with those people who caused damages inside me, I’ve learned.. Every beat of our broken hearts is a breakthrough.. Never let it become your reason to commit the same misery to others.. Don’t let it weaken your conscience.. Right must still rule over wrong.. Always remember how it feels when you’re on the dark side, the victim of the so-called love they made you believe..
Ayie will always be the first love in my life and my first broken heart.. Christian will always be the one I have loved the most, my biggest illusion and one of my frustrations.. And Ervin, he will always be my PARE, the TALL, DARK and ARMY who only played a game with me..
I am not perfect.. but it doesn’t mean I am incapable to love and unworthy to be loved.. Whoever is next and the last, I wish, who will occupy the special space in my heart, I am looking forward to meet him.. I pray he will be the RIGHT ONE.. Someone who is not like Ayie, who betrayed my trust.. Someone who is not like Christian, who made me feel undeserving.. And someone who is not like Ervin, who can afford to spoil my life..
I just want a simple man.. a responsible man.. an honest man.. a man who will truly love me.. I don’t want another one-way love affair.. Another experiment.. Another conquest.. Another emotional crisis.. I want certainty this time.. I want peace of mind.. I want security.. and I want forever.. smile: )
No comments:
Post a Comment